Just for the girls!

A MAGIC MIRROR

ps Who was that nice young man hiding under your bed Milly?

..... gone tomorrow.

The onboard beautician has asked me to announce that, due to the sudden purchase of exotic swimwear, she has only two free appointments for body waxing.

Also now available in our on board boutique next to the Carnival Pool.

The following range of men's swim and sports wear is now available in our on board boutique next to the Carnival Pool.

Here in the Vale of Pewsey in Wildest Wilts, crop circles are an everyday occurence at this time of year. Some of the aliens that create these examples of cereal art live on boats along the Kennet and Avon canal.

Last year a bunch of circle makers were in a wheat field in the wee small hours doing their stuff. On the hills above were a group of tourists, watching and waiting for a close encounter.....Neither group was aware of the other.

It was Dave's first time out and he needed a smoke. So In total contradiction to the unwritten lore of circle makers he lit up a ciggie, his long hair shielding the tiny flame from the lighter.

Yup, you guessed it, he set his coiffure alight and ran, panic stricken from the field in the direction of a small stream. Apart from hysterical laughter, to spur his flight, the others in the crew let him get on with it.

Imagine the scene, the following evening in the Barge pub..A group of earnest tourist looking at photo's and video recordings of a strange ball of light moving mysteriously across a darkened field. Clear evidence for the existence of a metaphysical cause for the resulting crop circle.

As for the boaters, they stifled the rising hysteria and crept out, including the guy in the corner with the trendy singe job.

You just couldn't make it up..